Welcome to my one-year dating experiment in New York, a city famous for its ruthless singles scene. New York's density, lifestyle and related industries make it so easy to meet other people and date without even trying for the most part, but relationships are an entirely different beast. New York, Where Singles Meet in New York, Meet People in New York, Dating Culture in New York, Dating in New York in Your 30s, What It's Like to Date in New York, It's Easy to Date in New York for Guys, It's Hard to Date in New York for Women, Gender Ratios in New York, Gender Ratios in New York City, Gender Ratios for Men to Women in New York. To avoid wasting hours traveling, I scheduled most of my appointments near my Upper East Side neighborhood.
If you want to date someone thinking about a long-term relationship, discuss conversations about future plans and the steps taken to achieve those plans, whether it's moving together, saving to move out of town, waiting to finish graduate school, getting x years of experience to get a job elsewhere. Without hunched people, without slow people, without indecision, without lack of drive: New York City filters these people naturally. By the end of the year, I had met with 25 men, had dozens of second and third dates, and chatted with the contestants until my phone burned in my hands. Dating in San Francisco is more likely to be boring, while bad dates in New York become legend.
My first date after the breakup was with an openly Republican lawyer from New Jersey who rented a pied-à-terre in the Financial District. The situation has worsened as communication is becoming an increasingly difficult skill to achieve (responsiveness, confirmation of dates, etc.) Moving from the Bay Area to New York, moving from San Francisco to New York, New York instead of taxis, food orders, attention at the bar, seats in the subway and crossing the street are the simple things that reinforce and train people to be aggressive in New York York). He had just moved to New York from Martinique and had recently had a nightmarish date with a socially awkward orthopedic surgeon he met on Bumble, who used his seven-course tasting menu dinner as an excuse to practice his broken French. Daters around the world seem to be on the same page, as New Yorkers' responses match the global average.