Sure, meeting new people is surprisingly fun and it's actually not too difficult, but the whole dating process is still a challenge in New York. Dating in New York is hard. Everyone is intelligent, knowledgeable, and interesting in New York. It looks like a secret club.
Everyone is an expert when it comes to witty jokes. People find it difficult to settle down and enter into a monogamous relationship. Welcome to my one-year dating experiment in New York, a city famous for its ruthless singles scene. Some people use dating as an excuse to network at work or make friends.
This ambition is also what leads people to prioritize work before relationships sometimes. Dating apps make it more difficult, since one will never run out of profiles to swipe through. It's OK to date casually and sleep, but don't expect to turn a connection into a relationship. As a dating coach for men %26 women, presented at the NYT %26 WSJ, I have worked with clients on all fronts of the dating spectrum, including style, body language, date ideas, strategy sessions for dating apps, taking profile pictures and helping with communication skills.
However, whether you only have one roommate or end up sharing your space with four city dwellers, live with others people can definitely test your ability to date. If you want to date someone thinking about a long-term relationship, discuss conversations about future plans and the steps taken to achieve those plans, whether it's moving together, saving to move out of town, waiting to finish graduate school, getting x years of experience to get a job elsewhere. Dating in San Francisco is more likely to be boring, while bad dates in New York become legend. Dates are easy to get and will feel great if you come from San Francisco, where you didn't have appointments, but you'll learn quickly, it'll be hard to get quality.
To cut costs, many New Yorkers go out for a drink or coffee instead of sitting down to eat on a first date. On average, they say 4.6 dates is the right amount of time, while men think it should appear after 2.6 dates. One assumption I had about living in New York City before I moved there was that they all lived close to each other, or that they could at least easily reach each other on a quick subway ride. I can't talk about what dating was like in other times, but I definitely appreciate that I can now be myself on dates and that I don't feel pressured to act a certain way as a woman.
New York's density, lifestyle and related industries make it so easy to meet other people and date without even trying for the most part, but relationships are an entirely different beast. Daters around the world seem to be on the same page, as New Yorkers' responses match the global average. Nobody is perfect, but some daters, including me, are sometimes simply unwilling to spend time looking beyond the smallest flaws, assuming that someone better will come along.